Oh how the mighty have fallen, eh? It’s only been two days since Michael Cohen was sentenced to three years in prison and the floodgates are already starting to open.

This morning an interview with Cohen appeared on Good Morning America where he began telling the ‘truth’ about his time as Trump’s personal lawyer. You can watch the interview here.

‘I will not be the villain of this story.’

Yeahhhhh ya fucking will be. Other people might be dumb enough to only see the veil of your bullshit, trying to buy back some clout for all the pain you’ve caused the entire planet over the last four years, but history will remember you as a shit covered rock that came bouncing down a hill, the start of a shitty avalanche that will eventually bathe the most powerful man in America in a smelly pile of shit that he and his entire family will never be able to wash off.

‘I think the pressure from the job is much more than he thought it would be.’

Imagine that, someone who has absolutely zero policy experience (except for fighting against inclusive housing regulations in New York City during the ’70s and ’80s) would have a hard time with international and domestic policies. I know more about international and domestic politics than Donald Trump, and I’m a fucking copywriter at a credit union.

What’s the old saying? ‘The people who are least qualified to be president are the ones who actually want to be president.’

How true that is. I don’t think it’s too much for him. I really don’t. I think he’s gone insane with power; that’s what’s happened. He’s finally got what he’s wanted for the last 14 years and he just doesn’t know what to do. He’s trying to take it as far as he can before it all blows up in his face. Sadly, it’ll all probably just blow up in our faces, as these things usually do.

‘… people would just blindly follow what he wanted done.’

This is really getting to the meat of the issue. People worship this dude like’s a fucking god of business. They’ll do anything for his approval. The kinds of people who ‘blindly follow’ leadership without questioning motivations or thinking whether or not they should do something are ruining this world. Sadly, that’s the type of society we live in. The constant content consumption and drastic polarization of political and ideological groups has destroyed society, scarred us so deeply that it’s going to take decades for these wounds to heal. All because people have stopped thinking, seeking out truth, and have begun blindly following those in power.

‘There’s a system here, and he doesn’t understand the system.’

No. Fucking. Shit.

‘Do you think President Trump is telling the truth about that (in reference to the Russia investigation)?’

‘No.’

Then tell us what you know you scum-sucking, bottom-feeding, turd eating nerf herder. End this madness. Put an end to this mindless bullshit. Take down the entire organization. Help us begin to rebuild after the last two years of history have turned us into the laughing stock of the solar system. (Why not the galaxy? You know what you did, Kepler 11f.)

‘Lay off Twitter.’

Lol.

‘You think you’ve turned a corner?’

‘I know I have.’

Fuck you. You know when you could’ve turned a corner? When you could’ve stopped this from ever happening. You did all of this for your own personal gain, for power, for money, for greed. YOU are to blame for this. All because you, as you so eloquently put it, ‘blindly followed’ his every order.

‘Somehow or another, this task has fallen on my shoulders.’

You brought this on yourself. Don’t act like you’re a poor, innocent bystander. You’re Atlas. You chose the wrong side, my friend, and now you’re facing the consequences.

My parents taught me that, from a young age. When I fuck up, it’s my fault. Own up to it. Don’t push it off on ‘Oh I don’t know what I was doing’ or ‘I was blinded by so-and-so’s smooth talk.’ This is your fault. Quit playing the victim.

‘I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to fix the mistakes that I’ve made.’

You damn well better. You owe it to us. Now quit talking about doing something and fucking do something.